It shocked me when I got notificated that my last post was from 6 May 2015, more than THREE months ago. To be honest, it didn't feel like that long at all, but you know what a weird thing time is.
A lot has happened in those three months, and I thought that in this post I could tell you a little about it and also what I want to do with this blog from now on. This is going to be a long, dready, deep post, so if you're not in for that, I suggest you stop reading here.
When you pass the age of 10, what logically follows, is puberty. Aka the time of your life where you grow up to become an adult, with all that comes with it. For some people it's harder than for others, but we all change like never before. For some people all these changes cause low self esteem, reduced self-confidence, which can result in depression, anxiety, stress, eating disorders, and other horrible things. Also keeping your bedroom clean can be a problem.
Now I'm not going to go into details here, because this IS the internet after all, but, like so many people I know, I'm stressing like crazy about all the littlest things. But, unlike so many people I know, for me that has caused me to have panic attacks. I had little knowledge about it, so as you can imagine I was pretty freaked out. My worst habit is that I sometimes forget I can ask people around me for help, and so this time again, I didn't. I figured it had to do with stress, and promised myself to put as little pressure on myself as possible. And, for me, the thought of being expected to upload a blogpost every Wednesday and Sunday was a bit too much pressure. When, at one point, I sorta collapsed in front of my parents, they helped me find someone that can help me figure out how to prevent myself from having a panic attack in the future, and what I can do to calm myself down if I get past the point of prevention. So that's where I've been.
The next step is the future.
I know myself too well to set upload dates, because it just will not work. So my current plan is just to upload whenever I have time, and God knows how many times a week that will be. Maybe, when I realize I upload quite frequently, I can think about setting dates, but that's for the future to decide.
Lastly, I want you to know that I'm not writing these posts because I feel like I have to, or because I feel like otherwise I'd be dissapointing you, or anyone else. I write them because I want to, because I love to. And that sometimes I have to take a break to remind myself of that.
And never forget, you don't have to do everything on your own.
Love,
Rosaly
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